Interview with Pascale Cook-Fernandes
In this episode, we will uncover 3 keys:
- Nurturing the Magic Within
- Unlocking Vibrational Wisdom
- Crafting a Life of Abundance
A Podcast Transcription
Episode 18: Pascale Cook-Fernandes, Happiness coach and the founder of “Women Finding Clarity”
Intro
Odiva Vasell: (00:00)
Hello, phenomenal fempreneurs! Did you ever think that you could have more joy, more happiness, and more clarity in your life? Yes, these are the things that we all want, and they are available to us when we become open and aware. My next guest will tell us just how to do that, so listen carefully to this enjoyable interview with Pascale.
I just have to say I’m really excited to have Pascale joining us and speaking to us a little bit about her passion in her business and her program. We’ve known each other for a while, and she is a rock-solid sister, and you are just really gonna enjoy hearing about her mission and what she gives to women around the world. So Pascale, go ahead, introduce yourself and tell us a little about you.
Nurturing the Magic Within
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (01:12)
I am so excited to be here, thank you so much for having me, inviting me into this place. It makes me so happy. Yeah, so I’m Pascale, and my company is called Women Finding Clarity. Yeah, right, I know, Women Finding Clarity, it just feels so awakening to me. It’s so good. It feels so good because it’s all about finding clarity, but not about anything externally. It’s about the clarity within, the clarity in who you are, of what you stand for, of what lights you up, of what’s important to you—your values, your beliefs. And when you can find the clarity in all of that, the whole world opens up to you, right? Yeah.
Odiva Vasell: (02:11)
Yeah, that is the first step, and I’m so grateful that now, at this stage of life, I’m realizing myself, what I want, who I am. Those are questions that I never asked. I had always lived the life of finding value outside of myself, so I had to get the degrees, I had to get the Masters, I had to get a certain job, I had to live a certain lifestyle so that I would validate or I would be validated, I thought. So in my head, but it’s never enough.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (02:48)
It’s never enough; you’re so on point with that, and our society literally has set it up that way. If you want to be successful, you have to check all the boxes, right? But what has happened in the course of someone’s life when they’re so focused on checking all the boxes, they don’t know who they are anymore because they’re so focused on the checklist, and they’re not focused on themselves. I know that sounds selfish to say, “Focus on yourself,” but one of the most altruistic things you can do for other people is to be strong in self so you can give to other people.
Odiva Vasell: (03:39)
And it’s not selfish. We’ve been conditioned to believe as women that when we do for ourselves, it’s being selfish, but it’s self-fulfilling. We’re filling up ourselves so that we can give and maintain healthy relationships with others.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (03:57)
And that’s how we fill up the world. That’s how we fill up the collective, to start by filling up ourselves. Yes, so powerful, right?
Odiva Vasell: (04:10)
It is, it is, and I hope for the women watching this, or even anybody watching this, to start to believe that you are enough.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (04:23)
Yeah, you are enough. She is enough, he is enough, they are enough, everyone is enough. And if we can just be comfortable, learn to get comfortable with our enoughness, then the whole world is enough, and the whole world is filled to capacity.
Odiva Vasell: (04:51)
Yes, that and will change the world because it’s the people that are trying to grab more by even taking from others, you know, it’s breaking the society. So being full in yourself, it’s a beautiful thing.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (05:10)
Yeah.
Odiva Vasell: (05:11)
And you also teach happiness.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (05:15)
I do. I do. When you say that, every time, you make me smile. First of all, there’s just something about you and this gift that you’re giving to every woman who listens, who’s on your channel, who comes to one of your classes, you’re doing that. You are filling their cup. You are helping these women to be everything they can be. And when they understand that and start to kind of wake up to it, that’s when they’re starting to fill up and realize their happiness, right? Because as a happiness coach, what I know is that happiness, while a lot of people think of it as an emotion, sure, happiness is an emotion. I can feel happy because I went out to lunch with a great friend today and celebrated St. Patrick’s Day with her. That made me feel happy. That was my emotion. I wasn’t sad. However, true happiness is when no matter what’s going on all around you, all is still right with your soul. And so that true happiness is not an emotion, it’s a state of being.
Odiva Vasell: (06:42)
And it’s so great that you say that. First of all, thank you for the affirmation of the work I’ve been doing. Thank you so much, and I’m open to receiving and to say thank you. And it’s great when you talk about happiness is more than the emotion because what we’re being sold is the emotion. You buy this, you wear this, you have this, and you’ll be happy. And then we do those things, and after, you know, for me, shoes, because I’m wondering, she’s the first time I put them on, and it’s like, “Hmm, okay,” you know, my gift arrived on Amazon. I was so excited, now I’ve worn it, and is the happiness gone because it was so fleeting when it’s dependent on something external.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (07:43)
That’s right, and you probably have a blister on your little toe because your new shoes were tight, right?
Odiva Vasell: (07:49)
Yeah.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (07:51)
But here’s what I’ve learned along the way. I worked with a coach who, I’m just not a makeup person, right? I’ll wear a little sometimes, and I’m just not a makeup person. And she is a beauty coach, and it’s really about being beautiful inside, and that’s what makes you radiant on the outside. One of the things that she talks about is, and your shoe reminded me of this, is that wearing makeup is not about needing the makeup to look a certain way. It’s not about needing the makeup to show up more powerfully. It’s about having fun with it, using it as a tool. If you want to show up on video and you want people to be attracted to your eyes, to look more into your eyes than you do your makeup a certain way. If you want them to really pay attention to your words, then you do your lips a certain way. So it’s not that she’s teaching you to put on a mask; she’s giving you tools to make what you already are, who you already are, more powerful.
Odiva Vasell: (09:12)
I love that. I’m so glad you said that because I was talking to a friend, and she does a lot of podcasts. I love doing video, and I coach women to get confident on video. She took my quiz and responded that she doesn’t do video because she’s not ready to put on makeup. And I said, “Have I been a bad example for you?” Because, you know, seriously, what I’m coaching is for you to show up as you, because people are gonna love you when you show up as you. I remember a period of my life, especially the last couple of years, I hadn’t worn any makeup, but people said I was glowing, and I was kind of like, “Okay, what’s going on here?” And it was just I had reached this phase, and I think it’s part of The Sisterhood, that I was realizing that I need to put myself first, and I started growing with that. As you said, the makeup is just, I have fun with it because it’s something that I had fun with in the past when I was growing up. So I’m getting in touch with that part of my life again, but it’s not about that for everyone.
Unlocking Vibrational Wisdom
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (10:36)
Exactly. Yeah, and they’re listening to your podcast, and they’re showing up because of your energy, because of the raised vibration that you’re bringing. So I’m not wearing makeup today, and I feel perfectly comfortable on this video because I’m showing up as myself in a raised vibration. I knew I was coming here to talk to you, so I laid down and closed my eyes for 15 minutes because I felt exhausted, and I thought I can’t show up at my best, most authentic, energetic self. I don’t mean energy like overly run; I mean the highest vibrational value. If I feel fatigued, and so I just closed my eyes for 15 minutes, right? That’s what it’s about, taking care of yourself, listening to your body, feeling into your soul, listening to your heart.
Odiva Vasell: (11:36)
Hydrating.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (11:37)
Yeah, hydrating.
Odiva Vasell: (11:40)
I want to take a moment to say sleep is the real makeup and just bringing energy. So you’ve been to my master classes, and I really preach about energy. Tell us about energy and how that relates to happiness.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (11:57)
Yeah, absolutely. So there are several things. I’m a Reiki master, and that is healing energy. I don’t have a physical space anymore since the pandemic. I had actually closed my office before that. But with… You can receive your Reiki one attunement, and that is for giving yourself energy healing and your family and friends. When you receive your Reiki two attunement, now you’re able to make it part of your business practice if you want to, and you also learn to send energy healing at a distance. So I can sit here right now, and as we’re talking, I’m sending you energy healing. Right now, what I’m doing is I’m sending you heart-centered pink energy. I’m sitting here with my hand, and that’s what I’m doing. I’m sending it here, and I’m sending it here, and it’s coming from my heart, and it’s all just pouring into you right now. Reiki energy is universal life force energy. So everything we know now is made up of energy. You know, woo-woo has said it forever, and now science proves it. So I love that these things are coming together, and it’s no longer one camp or the other. So I’m sure you’ve heard about “your thoughts turn into things.”
Odiva Vasell: (13:37)
Yes.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (19:38)
And where your attention goes, energy flows. That’s what it’s all about, is universal life force energy, harnessing that energy and using it for the greater good. For anyone who doesn’t know Reiki, the short explanation is everything is universal life force energy. If you can imagine that I’ve got a funnel in the top of my head, and it’s pulling that energy down from the universe, in through the top of my head, down through my energy centers, and out through the palms of my hands. It’s harnessing that energy and powerfully redirecting it. So it’s very healing, it’s very relaxing, it’s very beautiful. One of the things that I like to talk about are different energy centers in your body, how your experiences show up in your body, and how to really tune in, pay attention to the things you’re feeling in your body, to change that energy, to balance that energy. So if you are heartbroken, let’s say, and you really just close your eyes and feel and breathe into your heart and think about how that feels and start to notice it. Then you can harness that universal life force energy and pull pink light from the universe into your heart and surround your heart with pink healing energy. It’s not going to make your sadness necessarily go away instantaneously. It soothes your heart, it heals your heart. It’s like you’re giving your heart all the loving care and supporting it to heal itself all along the way.
Odiva Vasell: (15:45)
It’s beautiful, and I love what you said about awareness because what happens is, as women, again being conditioned to be happy or look happy or smile all the time, you start to suppress our greater emotions. What I’ve been learning is the permission. It’s okay to feel angry; it’s okay to feel heartbroken; it’s okay to feel sad sometimes. You cannot maintain, you know, a happy-go-lucky mask all day long. But it’s once you give yourself permission to feel those emotions, you understand they will pass.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (16:35)
Yes, and yes, and it’s so important to really feel them, really.
Odiva Vasell: (16:42)
Feel them.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (16:43)
The only way to really get through, get past them is to go through them, right? Because if you’re not going through it and feeling it and allowing it to just wash over you like a wave in the ocean, what you’re doing is you’re pushing it down, you’re ignoring it, you’re pretending it doesn’t exist. It’s like putting air into a tire. If you continue to put air in, put air in, put air in, eventually the tire is going to burst, right? So if you don’t allow yourself to go through the feeling and ride that wave, and you push it all down, pretty soon the pressure inside of you is going to just rise and raise, and then you burst. What does that look like? That looks like having an outburst at someone that you… It’s not in your alignment to have, necessarily, but you can’t help it anymore because you’ve held it all in for so long, right? It might look like, on a really extreme case, a nervous breakdown, or maybe you develop anxiety, or maybe you develop a tick, a nervous tick. Maybe you start to chew your fingernails, you know? So all of these things, you might develop high blood pressure. You might start to be less organized, and now you’ve got piles of papers and piles of laundry. So that’s why it’s so important because if you don’t allow the flow of energy to wash over you and just go through it, it’s gonna start to show up in other ways, whether you realize it in that moment or not.
Odiva Vasell: (18:42)
Good, so good. And then there’s the guilt.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (18:48)
Yes, which what does the guilt do? It pushes you down even further, and it’s just a vicious cycle, yeah.
Odiva Vasell: (18:59)
Beautiful.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (19:00)
You know when we’re talking about energy work, we’re talking about a vibration, right? And so with energy, there are different vibrational levels and emotions and feelings like guilt and shame, those are very low vibrating energies. So when you feel things like guilt and shame, what are you feeling? What is it doing to you? It is putting you almost in a protective position because you’re pulling your shoulders up, you’re curling yourself in, you’re putting your head down. Those are lower vibrating feelings. However, feelings, emotions, experiences that bring you joy, excitement, all of that is higher vibrating. It lifts you up. You’re able to walk around with your head held high. You’re able to expand your vision and see things that you didn’t necessarily see when you were feeling in that closed off lower vibrational space.
Odiva Vasell: (20:10)
Yes, and I love how even this conversation is vibrational, and the natural way that you teach people how to do this. In visibility coaching, I hear a lot of coaches telling people to fake it and stand like this and take deep breaths, and that’s not in core confidence. That’s not going to internalize in your system and make you feel good about what you’re doing. That’s like a two-minute fix, and then the air goes out of the tire, and you’re just back to yourself, and you’re like, “Oh, I didn’t do that well.” You have to go with the flow of energy and, again, give yourself permission to feel good.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (21:00)
Yes, and that’s what it’s all about. One thing that I talk about is masculine energy versus feminine energy, and I know, right? But the reason I talk about that is because they’re two very different things, and so our entire world up until the last 10, 20 years, maybe, have been all about the masculine way of doing things. So in masculine energy, and I don’t mean necessarily like men versus women, right? I just mean the way these energies show up, and I want to be clear about that because I don’t manage shame. I don’t think, “Oh, yay, women who manage…” I don’t think any of that. What I mean when I’m saying masculine and feminine energy… So masculine energy shows up as more of a go, go, go, a push, a win, um…
Odiva Vasell: (22:04)
Bottom line, what’s the bottom line…
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (22:07)
What’s the bottom line! It’s black or it’s white, let’s just get to it, let’s get it done, right? Feminine energy is more nurturing, it’s more encompassing, it’s more welcoming, drawing in. Masculine energy is very protective, these are my boundaries, these are my shields, whereas feminine energy is softer, more welcoming, it’s all of that. So I was on a panel last year, and one of our topics for our panel was living forward through peri and post-menopause. One of the things that I talked about is how those energies show up in our lives. In this time of life, you know, this menopause time, what happens with men? Men go through a midlife crisis, right? There is that feeling of “I’m almost out of time,” grasping at the way it used to be. In the feminine energy of this time of our life, it’s more of an awakening. If you can think of it like a flower opening, that’s what happens in this time because we’ve raised our children, we’ve worked. No matter what that looks like for you, it’s more of an awakening. It’s more of it’s time, almost like a springtime, it feels like to me, of raising up and waking up and looking around and saying, “Wow, I see so many beautiful colors that I didn’t used to see. I feel the warm sunshine on my face. I feel like I just want to reach out and help people and call in the beauty and share my… right?” So that’s the difference of masculine and feminine energy.
Odiva Vasell: (24:23)
Yes, yes, and in business, we have to find a way to balance both and bring them both into to really serve people adequately. Your business, what motivated you to start this business?
Crafting a Life of Abundance
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (24:42)
So interesting. You know, when you say in business, I say yes, and in life. I think it’s very important for everyone to have a balance of masculine and feminine energy because nothing is all or nothing, right? Our whole universe is duality where there’s light, there’s dark, where there’s high, there’s low, where there’s front, there’s back. So it’s important to have a balance of all of that. What led me to start this business? So if I back it up just a little bit, you know, I used to have a massage therapy business, and it was in that time that I got my Reiki certifications and all of those things. I taught mindfulness and meditation classes for kids; we had guided meditation for adults. It was all so beautiful. I took mediumship classes and did some mediumship work, and it’s all just been about the energy for me from that time because once you… it’s like turning on the light switch; once you turn that switch on and you can see, you don’t want to not be able to see anymore, right? And so, since that time, yes, it’s been about the energy in my life. I ended up closing my business, actually, because I was noticing that I was starting to miss things with my kids, and my daughter reached a certain age, and I was like, “Oh my God, she’s the oldest, she only has so much time left at home, and I’m missing things.” So it took about a year to come to the final decision that, yes, it’s important for me to close and be home with my kids; like, this is… So I did that, and then as they started to get older, more independent, you know, she graduated, I’ve got two more behind her, they’re all just growing up and doing their thing, and I noticed I’ve got more time on my hands. So now what is that going to look like? Because I’m not going back to massage therapy because I ended up with an injury anyway, a different story. And then all of a sudden, it’s interesting because I talk about manifesting and manifesting abundance, and so I put this idea out to the universe, like, “What’s next? What now? What do I do? Here’s my awakening. What’s my second act?” And I just wait, and all of a sudden I notice that people are calling me and texting me and saying, “I know we haven’t talked for a long time, but I’m really going through something, and I just want to talk to you about it,” you know. So this starts happening, starts happening, so that’s my first, like, “Hmm, I’m noticing something shifting here.” And then the next thing is I start seeing all kinds of things show up for me about life coaching in all different ways on social media with friends and all these ways. So I start researching coaching certification schools, and I reach out to my life coach, “Where did you go to school? Do you have opinions on these places?” So I went back and got my coaching certification, and then it’s just kind of been a gradual progression from there. And I love it. I literally love it. I walk downstairs sometimes when my husband’s working at home because I work from home too, and I’m like, “My life is magic, literally magic.” And that’s what can happen when you’re able to find your center, live from your center, manifest abundance, raise your energetic vibration, all of a sudden you look around and you’re like, “Wait, what? What do you mean we just got upgraded to a two-level suite at the hotel? We didn’t ask for that. We did ask for a late checkout from 11 o’clock, and they gave us two o’clock. Like, what? We tried to get reservations at this hotel, and they were fully booked, so we said, ‘We’re living in abundance; let’s just walk in and see if we can get a table.’ ‘Oh, sure, right this way.’ Things just start to be magic, and that’s all I can say is it feels like magic. But what is it? It is high vibrational energy that you are expanding into the universe, so there’s space. The universe is infinite, and so when you can open up to it, there’s so much more space for so much more magic to come in.
Odiva Vasell: (29:43)
Um.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (29:45)
Yes, it’s not just about things. It’s about all of it. It’s about feelings and friendships and love, and sure, financial abundance has space to come into you too, but it’s not about that. That’s just like the, um…
Odiva Vasell: (30:08)
Icing on the cake.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (30:09)
Thank you, yeah. I’m like in my mind, like sprinkles on a cupcake. I don’t know, it’s the icing on the cake. The cake’s still delicious but with frosting?
Odiva Vasell: (30:21)
Wow. And, yeah, thank you for talking about that manifestation of abundance and living a magical life. So I’m gonna really enjoy watching this replay, so I hope everyone that’s watching really watches this again and really hears of how you did it. You were just listening to your life pattern and just were open to the changes, things that people might have said, “No, I should… wouldn’t be doing closing my business,” but you were open to what you really needed because you were listening to yourself.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (30:56)
Yes, yes.
Odiva Vasell: (30:58)
You were so in tune. So, tell us the program that you have because I’m going to be putting links in the description for people to click on and be able to contact you. Tell us a little bit about the program now.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (31:13)
Yes, thank you. Um, so my program is called “Jump Start Your Joy,” and it’s a six-week program. I’m the happiness coach, and so I just feel like what a perfect name: Jump Start Your Joy. Let’s just kickstart you into raising your vibration, really starting to develop a relationship and come into alignment with who you are from within, right? Six weeks, you can do it. Anybody can do it for six weeks because it doesn’t happen overnight. It’s little by little, baby steps, step by step. And six weeks, I feel, is not six months. To see an enormous… in six weeks, you’re not going to suddenly live in a mansion or be invited to speak on a TED talk, right? Not necessarily. However, in six weeks, it’s a jump start. Let’s jump-start you. Let’s really start to turn inward and see what she wants. See how she feels. Do you remember her? What are her beliefs? What are her values? You know how is she interacting with the world and how is she allowing the world to interact with her, and we can always work together beyond six weeks. But six weeks is such a great jumping-off point.
Odiva Vasell: (32:48)
Thank you, and I love that keyword you said: baby steps. That, again, along with giving yourself permission, allow yourself to take things slowly and really enjoy the process, rather than “I have another goal to set for myself, and if I don’t get that goal right away.” You know, our instant gratification society. But really, baby steps. And Pascale is the woman that’s gonna… you can feel her energy. She’s gonna just welcome you in and bring you into the fold and just really start to open your eyes to what a beautiful life that you can create and have created. So, I just want to thank you for joining us today.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (33:42)
Absolutely. And, you know, two things: One, I know you’re gonna put my website down there, and I so appreciate that. And I want to say that, you know, if anyone wants to have a conversation with me, I do have a place on my website where you can book a complimentary 30-minute session with me called “Breakthrough to Clarity.” So you can find clarity around, you know, what’s holding you back, what you need to do for yourself to move forward, whether you feel like that’s doing work with me or not. It’s a complimentary call. And the second thing is, you know, you’re saying that I will bring them into my fold, but thank you for bringing me into your fold because, you know, in the abundance that I have manifested and continue to do, you showed up, and here you are. And I never knew you. I didn’t know you existed. But, you know, you meet people, and on a certain level, you feel their authenticity and who they really are. And that’s what I feel with you. And so, thank you so much for having me here, and thank you for allowing me to be in your fold.
Odiva Vasell: (35:06)
Oh, thank you.
Pascale Cook-Fernandes: (35:11)
Um, yeah.
Conclusion
By understanding the power of raising your vibration and aligning with your true desires, you can manifest an abundance of opportunities and a more fulfilling lifestyle. The path to self-discovery and empowerment starts with the simple yet powerful act of taking one step at a time. Whether you’re seeking personal transformation, enhanced well-being, or a more positive outlook, this journey begins with the first step. So why wait? Take the plunge and explore the path to a life overflowing with joy, abundance, and unwavering purpose. Your destiny is within your grasp, and the adventure is just beginning.